Todd Paris, Associate Editor and Salisbury Attorney
♦ RFP Staff: “We recognize that some folks suffer “stinging butts and bruised egos” due to the Rowan Free Press’s penchant for airing the truth about Salisbury, N.C. the “City of Make Believe”: 17.3 square miles area surrounded by reality. Those few who still believe the “City of Make Believe” is the center of the known universe are liable to feel hurtful feelings as reality breaks through the cult like closed information society formed by city’s dwindling true believers. To offer a tissue and the balm of being heard, the Rowan Free Press Staff provides Todd Paris’s Check List Form below:”
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OFFICIAL ROWAN FREE PRESS BUTTHURT REPORT
Date of article and subject: ____________________________________
If you haven’t actually read the article check here ( )
Was a tissue actually needed for the tears? Yes ( ) No ( )
Reasons for butthurt:
Ruined Salisbury’s time to shine. ( )
Exposed an inconvenient truth. ( )
Was posted before the “fishwrapper” could post a prophylactic story
to reduce the sting ( )
Reduced my property values by exposing the City’s dirty secrets ( )
Exposed a truth which may keep businesses from being “lured” into town ( )
Exposed a truth that might keep someone from buying my house, trapping me here ( )
Exposed the local fish-wrapper newspaper as a mere booster page for council
Incumbents and staff ( )
Exposed a truth that may have a negative effect on City bond ratings ( )
Made me look imbecilic for a lie I told in public ( )
Will you be able to move past it? Yes ( ) No ( ) Maybe with time and my emergence into adulthood ( )
Name _____________________________________
Date _______________________________________
